I see two kinds of patients—those who have had massages previously, and many who have never experienced it before. It is always wonderful to provide massage for those who have gone their entire lives without and to see the unexpected and immediate sense of relief that can often be felt afterwards. It is something that I personally feel that every person should try, at least once. But for patients who have had massage prior to their time in hospice, the experience can provide a kind of familiar comfort. Recently, I had the privilege of providing massage for a patient who had enjoyed massage all over the world. She told me about her favorite kinds of massage that she had tried and was very clear about what she needed worked on during our sessions. During my last session with this spirited and dignified woman, she was unable to communicate with me verbally. But even in the last days of her life, she was still offering me her hand or her foot, with eyes closed. The family said that it was the most she had moved in days and that massage was one of the most beneficial therapies she had received during her time in hospice. I find it fascinating how the body knows and can communicate its needs without a single spoken word. This experience taught me how to better listen to those unspoken messages, both from my patients and my own body. We all know what we need if we can only be still and quiet enough to listen. Afterall, it is often those words left unsaid that say so much more.
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